Prayer

Most of the time, my answers come waay,before I need them, so a little pondering what I know and "Voila" there it is, but this is my sincere desire:

I know that as we teach children they get very important insights from reading the scriptures, and they might not read their scriptures outside of class, but I want to actually intrduce and study the stories in the scriptures and so I am torn between teaching stories or teaching the scriptures...they are scripture stories, but I want the story imbedded in their heart and mind, but I also want to study the scriptures and get that benefit of coming to recognize their father in Heaven. Please, my wish is to know what to do, all I think is read the scriptures and then translate, but I fear that moght take away from what the spirit is already teaching them. One day, for example, I asked the lids to tell me what they learned in order to leave the classroom. And the things they shared were not at all what I intended to teach, somethings totally surprised me like that children in Israel sometimes got to sleep on the roof. Huh? It was a lesson about Christmas.

I see how many truths in a lesson that one might find useful to have been mindful of, but if I lightly mention it....OH! It is about having faith and trusting that they will be taught wgat they need regardless if they understand the story I want to teach. Ok, ok. Got it.

As a result of "Love Kennedy"

The more I see and feel together the more skeptical my thoughts get. Meaning the division is greater and greater, but, they are united in one thing: my children.

I gave each child a 20 sec. Plus hug last night and while doing so I prayed and hid what I truly felt with a placid intellect. When I retired to my own bed I was so sadden by the reality that neither child was actually mine. If anyone wonders what love is, that "anyone" is not me. I do not love my spouse, though I have tried and prayed almost constantly for years. I am mortally dependant on him, but could change that although he seeks to thwart me. I explained it to Joseph as being trapped, but realizing it is only a pumkin shell.

I truly love Joseph and Mary, and in the film Love, Kennedy peace was found in moments where a greater plan was realized, though admittedly such realizations often caused considerable pain they also brought peace. At one point "Kennedy" says, "If the Family always chooses the right, we will be together." That is why families are sealed and basically why we have temples altogether.

In my master plan to unite my heart and my mind, I must include sealing those children to me. I love them, no, it is not the pitocin talking. I know them and love what I learn.