I am really really struggling here

I kniw what I must do an with the right perspective everything seems simple, so why isn't it? Well, because it is similar to a teen ager refusing to grow up and acknowledge  they will never be a small child anymore. Usually, they have so many other things to admire that they do not think much of it. 

 I know that I am a big woman and will never be the tiny girl I was but, I am struggling to let go because I do not feel like I ever met my potential at that age, so now I am still trying instead of just tossing up my hands and saying, oh well, failed that one, and now start the next stage. I will likely fail this stage, too if I do not recover.

Seriously, would I lose anything slightly equal to the peace of mind I would gain from just accepting that I am not the most beautiful woman that ever existed. I never actually had the potential to be anyhow, and now I ought to be happy that I don't even have to worry about it anymore. Like my best friend LeAnne said, "You do realize most people don't even like to run." She persuaded me that I ought to feel relieved that I have that burden taken from me, because I couldn't even run if I wanted to. Likewise, it is like recognizing that I cannot change my weight with diet and exercise, so stop trying. I have sufficiently proven that I cannot change my stature no matter how I try, and I did try for decades of my life now.  But, I am extremely healthy. Now. It is time to focus on true beauty that lasts!